Lost But Found

I'm forgetful, I admit it.  I'm always busy running from one place to the next, trying to multi-task, and then I'll forget where I put something simple, such as the set of car keys I just had in my hands, say two seconds ago.

Recently, I was at the laundry mat helping my younger brother try to wash and dry out the ticks that were on his clothes.  A long story in itself to say the least, but as I walked outside with him to my car, I couldn't seem to find my keys.  I literally dumped my purse out trying to look for it and then checked my pockets too.  I then looked on the ground and went back and traced the path I had taken to the car.  Still, it was not there.  So, I went inside the laundry mat and proceeded to look at every place or thing I touched.  Sure enough, I spot it on top of the washing machine I had used.  That's when I remembered I had put the keys there while I was trying to free my hands to pour the laundry detergent into a cup.  Feeling stupid and relieved at the same time, I head back to the car to go home.

Incidents like this make me realize how losing things, whether a key, toy, an unsaved document on the computer (I think this has happened to at least everyone!), or person in your life can cause so much unwanted stress.

Years ago, my brothers and I found a stray cat, whom we adored to pieces, but could not keep.  We ended up taking her to the animal shelter, where I was informed a few days later that she had been reunited with her owner.  Imagine how this owner must have felt?  To have lost something so precious, but to have also been able to find it back? For myself, I was happy the cat had  returned to her home, but I was sad to know I would never see her again. So, my find became my lost.

Back in school, kids would lose everything or have it stolen.  It was either one or the other. Someone was always forgetting where they put something or someone always wanted what others had.  When things were found though, it was always put in the "Lost and Found" bin, where some of it was picked up and where others remained lost forever, with no one to claim or care to find what they had lost.  I used to tell my friends our school bin should be renamed, "Lost But Found" since nothing is no longer lost after it's been found.

What happens though when you lose something you can never find or replace?  The stress stays and it lingers, creating a heavy burden on you mentally and physically.  When my grandfather died, I was in fourth grade and to be honest, I didn't shed a tear.  I continued wandering around playing games and wondering when the adults would serve the pizza after they were done saying their prayers to him.  It wasn't that I didn't care or love my grandfather, I just think I was too young to have it really register.  Years later, I found myself missing him and feeling guilty for my lack of emotions or complete understanding of his death.  He was gone and he was never ever coming back.  It took me some time to get over my guilt and allow myself to heal.  Even though I had lost him, I learned to find peace later on with his death.

The loss of anything causes stress, but you can't or shouldn't live in the stress. What's done is done.  You can't fix a problem by dwelling on it, but you can sometimes try to solve it or make it better.  A loss is by no means an end.